that's all, just "MMWWAAHAHAHAHA!"
Well, why are you still here? ok, your loss. here goes.
If you ever wonder what kind of parent you are, just ask your kid. i did. i apparently need to "have more fun" and "Take {Roni} to Six Flags Over Texas more". But other than that i am getting all A's! i asked for some clarification on the whole having fun thing and i was told that i, mE, as in mIS! didn't go have enough fun. And i didn't take her shopping for clothes, make up, and shoes quite enough, but since i also need to "Get more money from work" she could over look that in favor of Six Flags. i asked about the yelling, pointless threats, beatings, and the heavy use of Nyquil to force sleep and she said she may stop them next week if i'm a good girl.
i used to tell her i'd sell her to gypsies on the corner. Then it became, "i will cut off your hands." Or "i will rip off your huge pumpkin head." It has advanced to "i WILL tie you up, throw you in the closet and beat you like a monster!" and "But i really just want to TASTE the leg! It looks crunchy and will taste good with ketchup!" She only feel threatend when i solemnly promise her that she will wear the UGLIEST CLOTHES I CAN FIND TO SCHOOL!
How did i get a sissy-girl? i was a tom-boy. there was not a tree on my street i didn't climb or a roof i hadn't jumped off. i know how to make rock bombs that HURT! i could climb a rope and jump things up to 3/4 my height with a running start. i could ride my bike down the street with one foot on the seat and the other steering. i could sleep in a tree. So how did i get a sissy-girl? My darling girl would rather put on makeup than roll in mud to better hide. She is only six years old and cleans her nails every night. And her toenails. She has knee-hi suede boots in black. black pilgrim shoes with zippers. glitter-purple barbie sneakers. black high-heeled sandals. black low-heeled sandals. black low-heeled buckles. rope sandals in high, medium, and flat. white platform tennis and white keds in pleather. white buckle flats. pink ones. i wear heels, yes, but i HAVE TO. other wise i want my black-n-white sneakers or huge clunky black platform shoes that are so comfy and cool. oh, well. i can pretend i am the little girl that lived next door and try to think like a DYED BLONDE IDIOT or ask my little baby sis, Brat, who helped spawn this terror upon me if i'm really lost.
i am by NO MEANS butch or anything . . . but sometimes Roni & Brat pick on me for my jeans and men's shirts. i can wear the shit out of a miniskirt and i can do some really great things with makeup when i want to. i love skirts, especially the really long ones that sweep your ankles. and damned if i can't do some great things with clevage! (every doctor i have ever met has advised i get my breasts SERIOUSLY reduced. like, at less that half of what they are now, i would still be a D. just ask NaomiBeth ~ she knows me in RL.) And then just ask her about The Voice. i promise i am all woman, but i am not a princess and don't understand the mentality. i only understand Goddess mentality and that's what they actually call me at work for some muddy reasons i am still not clear on. Just beware of my wrath! (Didn't really sound all that menacing did it? well, i will work on that.)
Hey, Rizzn, can i borrow a page from you book here for a minute? Pretty please with kittens on top? *This is where i pretend i saw him nod. he does that ya know ~ nod.* Thank you! You're GRRREEEAAT!!! Guuhreat, too but only if you like. ;">
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"Sometimes I sit here and wish I had something mindblowingly amusing to say to the people who read this site..
..But then I think... why should I feel guilty because you have intellectual masochism issues?!
If you wanna read stuff that sucks, who'm I to stop you?"
"The real me is in the midst of turmoil and irreversible psychological damage, so Ive replaced me with the other me who's just going to talk about stuff that doesnt really matter until you get tired of my blathering and stop reading."
"Im still waiting to lose everything. And every day I feel a little closer to the brink. One day, I'll slip.. I'll lose my footing and come crashing to the ground, everything once held close to me.. scattered too far for my broken hands to reach.
Im waiting. Im waiting and Im scared."~ Malkavia
Ok, so it damn near breaks my heart. Yes, i feel like this sometimes and yes i LIVED in a place in me that was this way all the time once. She is really so beautiful ~ go read her, ok? That is, if you don't already. Not may of you out there who aren't reading her already is there? SHE RAWKS!
thanks again, Rizzn!
confessed on 2000-12-08