Have you ever had a dog AND a cat?

If you have then you know how much dogs like kitty biscuits.

Now, today i was talking to Russ who is single (again) and bummed along with being sick and miserable. i think we got onto this subject because is said he was "sick as a dog." Upon hearing this i asked him how sick dogs were. i know they lick their own genitals and do their own rim jobs, too, there is the whole toilet vs. bowl for drinking water debate, but really, how sick are they!

Then i went off on one of the cheer-up-your-friend-by-horrifying-them stories. It goes as follows:

When i was younger i was sly and evile and it amused me to be so. When the cat box would fill up and i didn't feel like cleaning it, i would let the dog in and he would immediately make a bee line to the cat's room. He would scarf down the food and then turn to the box for his favorite treat, the kitty biscuits. He would root around to make sure he had caught and eaten every litter-studded morsel of poo and then i'd open the back door and let him run back out to wash it all down with pool water. i would add some more litter for the fresh litter smell and stir it up a bit. Then, when dad got home, he would unsuspectingly go out into the yard and get joyfully welcomed home by the dog.

The very same poop eating dog would be licking his hands . . . .

and his arms . . .

and his feet . . .

and HIS FACE!

and i would just laugh and laugh . . .

so, i leave you now with this story of wicked depravity and glee.

Until next time,

:-P

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confessed on Monday, Aug. 19, 2002