i dreamt i saw you walking
up a hillside in the snow
casting shadows on the winter sky
as you stood there counting crows
one for sorrow, two for joy,
three for girls, and four for boys,
five for silver, six for gold, and
seven for a secret never to be told

there's a bird that nests inside you
sleeping underneath your skin
when you open up your wings to speak
i wish you'd let me in

from "a murder of one" ~ counting crows
i have been thinking a lot lately

and i want to say, "thank you"

Thank you for cleaning out my car

Thank you for stressing over the bills for years and always making it come out right.

Thank you for the new experiences like the parties, after parties and mornings after the after parties.

Thank you for the apricot scrub showers.

Thank you for the computer knowledge and all the wonderful programs.

Thank you for the VUE - i may have given up and you made it happen.

Thank you for the cat - i loved her from her birth and she is a sweet, albeit neurotic, constant companion.

Thank you for the furniture, i really do love it.

Thank you for the sheets, they never leave the bed for long.

Thank you for the bill matrix (even though it is not really a 'matrix' - it just seemed cooler to call it that.)

Thank you for the Sunday morning wrestling matches at the old apartment - i'm sure the downstairs neighbors hated us but they were probably the most fun i ever had with you.

Thank you for the good times like the movies, concerts, dinners, shopping trips and the little black dress.

And most of all, thank you for leaving so that i could rediscover who i am after so many years of being unhappy.

you were right about one thing - you should never have come back - we haven't been happy in two years or so.

i didn't want it to end so badly, but you lied to me. i could have forgiven anything else and loved you forever from a nice safe distance. i wish it was another way but it's not . . . you are dead to me, ash in the wind.


0 people can smell that i've been thinking

confessed on Monday, May. 22, 2006