i am such a dirty whore. i mean to update, really i do. i mean to and then something comes up. every time. truly!
i have been so wrapped up on music lately that i can't seem to concentrate on anything else. i hardly talk to anyone but Glorianna and Stitch. Well, i talk to The Tick when he's free, but i know he's been busy as he had to change departments and the old super was a total slitch and now he's doing computer/phone work instead of walking the floor rescuing the agents like he did before she got a hold of him. anyways, stating over means you're slow and i don't want to bug him anyways.
so there i am with G&S laughing it up on a daily basis but bored outta my mind as soon as i leave.
i think Angel's got PMS or something cause he's been irritable, sarcastic and bitchy all the time this week. And flouncy. you know, like if it doesn't go his way, he flounces away in a huff! i'd laugh but it'd only be the beginning of a new argument.
trust me, i've been a woman long enough to know that if the other party is LEAVING the discussion, let them go. let the subject go. let go of their arm, neck, foot, hair, whatever. and never mention it again. it will only be the beginning of a newer bigger argument that you will now never win as it was over and YOU dragged up a 'settled' matter. you went into the past first and opened up a HUGE can of slithery snakes that will not only bite you in the ass but anywhere else they reach, too. in fact, by delving into the past first, you give the other party full permission to gather every bit of ammunition from the past to use against you. There is no defense possible and you will now be required to shoot down the missiles aimed at you and hopefully get a few hits in until someone wins.
then, NO MATTER WHO WINS - APOLOGIZE. "i'm sorry i was such an idiot" will usually suffice and get you off the hook unless there were tears and then you simply have to pull something outta your ass. something like a spontaneous romantic dinner and movie or flowers, maybe even something she really likes. An evening without kids. a long scented bath. something girly. act like you love her but have no interest in sex. you just want her to be happy. then, if you play your cards right, you are off the hook and if you are really good at back rubs you might just get rewarded yourself.
just don't count on it.
the complete beauty of being me is that i know all this but i think it's shite. i may get mad but it usually doesn't last long and if i tell you off you usually get something out of it. what you don't get it a chance to speak. well, maybe i'll let you answer me at the end, but not usually. i'll just tell you i'm mad and why; what you do with that info is YOUR business.
one of the few complaints i have heard about me is that people have said i am manipulative. i don't see this. so what if i'm nice and people either love or hate me. so what if the ones who love me want to please me and make me happy. so what if i feel that loving someone means not lying. if i care about someone, they will know exactly what i am thinking and feeling as i won't hide it. if they change what they do and say because of how it makes me feel, they are being considerate, not manipulated.
a statement is just a statement. a question means i'd like an answer. i try not to talk in riddles as no one i know gets it when i do and that takes all the fun right out of it. if i don't talk to you for a while, i guess i didn't have anything new to say.
eeeek! i am totally going off on a tangent here.
it's time to go, i'm tired and i have to pee.
confessed on Friday, Jan. 17, 2003