Wishing any change to my past invalidates my present.
i recently took a long walk through my history. i dug through my diary, my prose, my stream on consciousness and the social media. i pulled up old chats and browsed through old pictures. i examined time lines and took measure of the distance traveled.
too far is never far enough.
it was funny to look back and gaze into the face of fear and insecurity; to read the raw wounds, feel the jagged edges and taste the salty tang of the tears as it washed away the blood. nothing is ever easy for me and still worth doing and even in tragedy i found a reason to laugh. whistling in the dark...
new people make me introspective, retrospective and offer a new perspective.
ah, well, in in retrospect i see the naivete in myself, the fear the neediness. all i can really say is that i lived over it.
no matter how far you run, your problems will always follow... you carry them within yourself. eventually you have to take a stand.
0 people can guess my damn age!
confessed on Thursday, Mar. 29, 2012